I often talk about the joy art brings us day after day, but then there are times we’re away from the easel much longer than usual. A while ago, I was on a two week “break” from my art, yet there were a number of projects keeping me totally occupied. Finally, late on the last day, I wandered into my studio and started a pastel portrait.

Right from the start, it was labored with none of my personal flourish. I pecked away, one stroke at a time with little continuity or flow. Each stroke was pondered, then once laid, had me worried…tense. Sure, I was back at the easel after that two week intermission, but my art was stilted, lifeless and definitely not Harley Brown. I felt I was retraining my hand and eyes; my hand felt like a lifeless lump and my eyes started glazing over as if in a stupor. Even my emotions got prickly. Sure, it had happened before, but this time I thought I’d really lost it and fell into bed, mentally exhausted.

HER WORLD

I think our human faces are always compelling and eternally inspiring. Note her head turned, showing the eyes, nose and lips having touches of light. The artistic journey with this portrayal needs “fine tuning” with her distinct, expressive features. There are a few strands of flowing hair, most of it is with dark shapes, adding to the drama. That edge of hair on the right is very soft as it lingers into the atmosphere. It especially works in contrast against the sharper edges of the nose and forehead. We sense her momentary aloofness as she concentrates on something in the distance.

The next morning I woke up a bit fidgety and went straight to the studio. The art piece there on the easel, seeming to look even worse than when I left it. It was though a gremlin snuck in and threw on extra wonky strokes to rattle me more. This was grim: the jerky, murky manner from a confused and somewhat collapsed mind. 

Then…
In a blink and almost uncontrollably, I let myself go—grabbing pastels and laying them down with utter urgency. My confidence swung back within seconds and my patented grin crept across my mug.

There was this major difference: As I did each stroke, I didn’t look back at it, because I knew it was right, and was already on to the next dab. Insecurities disappeared as I continued to lay down new areas as well as arrogantly repairing the previous day’s mishandlings. I felt like a Pamplona bull that couldn’t be stopped. I was so geared, I had to periodically dash to another room for a few moments just to catch my breath in finding myself and assuming command.

My mind had been in a log jam the day before, but my inner mind was ready. My inner mind had gotten alerted and warmed up with the previous day’s attempt and was now charging ahead. I was giddy and promised myself the daily regimen to draw or paint. No excuses. (Do one hour or more. Mostly more, but one hour can keep the mind geared.)

Bottom line: when things go sour, we don’t give up. You and I have art in us, and it won’t go away. It will always be faithfully with us. Even with odd hindrances, art is the love affair of a lifetime. 

More on “Seeing”
I talk about this often and will explain it from a different perspective. I’m a reactor in the visual art world. I react to what I see; I do not “invent.”

Here’s what I’m talking about: I was doing a fellow’s portrait and needed to place a hat on him so I used a photo reference. The photos were okay but lacked some essentials. Well, I took the lazy route and tried to invent those “essentials.” They weren’t bad, but the hesitancy I was having kept me inconsistent. In other words, I wasn’t too sure where this was going. It seemed okay, but when I would walk away and come back, I saw the strained follies.

Finally, I went out and got the right hat. I placed it on the model, and the rest of the painting went with a blaze of glory. I reacted confidently to the values, the shapes and shadows and the colors that were reaching out to me. This never fails, and yet, I have to once in a while remind myself: do not guess or invent, go to the truth. And I’ll continue to pass this on to you, dear reader. The truth allows us our best capabilities. In my art, I look for and find that truth, then allow my impassioned mind and fingertips to flow with life.

YOUNG HARLEY

I’ll say it: a well done artist’s portrait can be more alive than a photograph. This pastel I did really brings me back to when I was around ten years old. I was shy, midway smart, and I loved piano and art. I also looked forward to every day, because each one was like a brand new gift. 

The main light is coming from “Harley’s” left, and a cool light is coming from the other side. There’s a shadow going gently down the face between the two lighted sides. Intense observation with that shadow pays off with all the effort put into such a portrait. You also see the abstract background helping the overall design. The color works with the feeling.

What this Means
My art isn’t photographic. I might decide to exaggerate certain observed areas, maybe push contrasts and colors—lay in my artistic persona. Those things I do with a natural flourish when I’m inspired and prompted by the actual subject. Like interpreting a well-known piece of music. Something I loved doing in my jazz piano days. All these thoughts from my heart to you. 

Yes I use photographs, but I’m not beholden to them. When I observe an artist’s work done from a photograph, I sure would like to see how the artist was personally inspired by that photo. We want the artwork to feel it was naturally created from life and not from a photograph. Our eyes and mind quite understand the life that’s seen within a photo. Art needs life.

The Three B’s
Then there are the three B’s.

Beethoven, Brubeck and The Beatles. Oh yes, there are many more of equal significance. I’m placing these three as part of my early times with learning life, and understanding the stratospheric profoundness of music. Music has truly influenced my art on so many levels, right to this day. 

Blessings to the three B’s and to all of us in the arts. Like a musical trio, let’s do an artist’s trio:

Outer mind. Inner mind. Subject. 

GRETA GARBO

This portrait was a pure joy to create. Greta Garbo became a major film icon during the 1930s. Once she appeared on the silver screen, filmgoers couldn’t take their eyes off her. Watch her last scene in Queen Christina.

 

Remember This
I can’t remember people’s names or figure out how to order groceries on the internet. Here’s the good part: I really don’t care as long as I can put shadows around a nose, shape lips and eyes, form hair—actually form anything along with background and foreground. So bottom line: our art makes up for all misfortunes and keeps our minds flying like kites. 

Not So Boring
Personally, I can be quite a bore depending on the people I’m with. And those of you who have this same feeling should know that you are in fair company. Along with family and friends, I’m much more comfortable alongside folks in the art world; yes dear reader, us eccentric, lovable artists. So you out there who feel the same as me and so many others in the arts, get used to peace within your heart and soul because we’re in this together.

Modern Education
There are numerous lectures and books that try to explain much of the why, how and who in contemporary art. So, to understand today’s aesthetics, it seems we need to listen, to read and to take “Modern Art 101.” This isn’t quite as true with the other arts of today: music, film, books, dance, stage and non-contemporary art. Incidentally, I would fail miserably in that MA 101 class. 

We Own Our Minds
When laying in the strokes, I’m not thinking of Lautrec or Remington or any of the other artists as to what they might do with such areas. My art is me; like how I talk and walk. All our lives, since birth, we’ve been influenced by the world around us. But we do funnel it down to finally being ourselves. 

When I’m working on a pastel, there is nothing on the outside world that concerns me, including whether my piece will sell, or even be liked. What I’m saying is that after all these years, I trust myself enough that what comes from this work will eventually satisfy me. I have years understanding my personal use of color, design, values and working with subjects that inspire me. The finished artwork will be a visual expression of both the subject and me. So, ladies and gentlemen, you’ll see me at an art show I’m in. I might not be there, but you’ll still see me.  —

BALINOFSKI

MEMORIES KEPT

Memories Kept

 

This work was completed without moments of hesitation or pondering, and virtually flowed from me. Observing it, there are little bits that I could have worked over, but I didn’t and won’t. It is a visual reflection of this man’s expression that remained quite fixed; as if he was thinking of a particular time in his life that he didn’t want to lose. Actually, his manner helped me keep the work fairly loose. Most importantly, I wanted to retain that look on his face. In an expressive way, it had meaning for both of us.

To me, in part, this portrayal reveals a person whose mind has entered a private world of remembrance. That was the main reason I didn’t want to work on it even slightly after he left—I wanted all of it influenced by his actual presence. You can see the strokes laid into the face, then left unaltered; the background done with nothing holding back. While creating, we know when to retain, unaltered, certain things given to us as artists. We know instinctively when it matters.

I often talk about inner and conscious minds. Well, my subconscious owns this particular piece of art. As with Harley, I have said this many times: All my works of art, I do for me, for my own limitless satisfaction. You can sense this.